An Unexpected Nanny

Saturday, June 30, 2012

Out with the Old

A long while ago when we got cable at our house, I made a decision that I thought worked well. To NOT get it in the living room. Now any Aussie's are going to think...we call it a lounge room in Australia...well we do but it isn't. It is a living room because that's basically where I live when I'm awake.


So I got the cable in the bedrooms where the family can happily go to watch whatever they want...within reason of course with the youngest. This left me with the old squarish TV that wasn't digital ready. Not a problem, not for me. I could usually find something to have on in the background while I 'lived'.


Living for me entails writing, chatting, basically everything I do on the computer. It also includes peeling vegetables, baking and whatever else you do in the kitchen...  I could still see and hear my antiquated old box from there. There were even times when I decided to fold one of the mountainous piles of clean washing and fold it into piles along the sofa while I happily watched one of my programs.  That's what sofas are for aren't they?


The BIG plus with my old TV was that I was the only one that could see it's beauty. No one else stayed for long. They would come and chat as they were passing through to get more food or drink. They'd ask me what I was writing...usually something that was very quickly shut down when anyone walked into the room ...Nothing though clears a room like vegetables being peeled or washing being folded. House work in general.


Yesterday was a fateful day however as a new member of my family arrived in the shape of a gift. A large flat screen TV that was digital ready. I have to say I WAS a little impressed. It stands there proudly with it's shiny new blackness. The picture is sooo clear and the sound is fantastic. They've also given me extra channels....and THIS is the problem.


Suddenly people are finding an appeal in the living room....my living room. The room where I live. Instead of running the morning news channel quietly in the background while I tap away at my computer, I now have someone flicking through several extra channels of noisy cartoons while I try and string a few thoughts together. My husband suggested that we could all watch the third and final State of Origin football match together in the 'lounge' room on Wednesday. He must have seen the tragic look on my face because he sweetened the deal with some booze and a chinese meal...I guess there will be perks.


Who would have known after all these years of teaching children to share I'd finally have to do it myself...


Becky's Last Chance at Blushing Books


And at Amazon Kindle


My Fanfics can be found here...



Wednesday, June 27, 2012

Where Did I Go? Where Am I now? and Where am I going?

Where did I go? I've been a lot of places but that's not really what I mean. I mean the me that was born into a family of four children...you know, the early me.


Short answer is, I got married and had children. Don't get me wrong. I've never regretted for a minute marrying my husband...well maybe a second here and there but those are the times I put hot english mustard thickly on his sandwiches and move on. Nothing like the pungent tang of a dose of the mustard shooting up the nose  to remind someone it's time to pull their head in...especially when it happens very rarely.

Of course I've never regretted having my children either, any of them. I Love my family to death. They give me so many laughs and trouble and fun, not to mention an abundance of writing material.

That being said, when you get married and have children, the person that was essentially you slips away little by little. I don't think it goes altogether it all just gets a little archived for a while. I have become my husband's wife and each of my children's Mum and that's fine but for a lot of years I lost sight of what I wanted to do for myself...of what I really liked.


Where am I now? Obviously I'm here, writing this but once again I'm talking a little more deeply. I'm finally finding myself again in a lot of ways. I'm writing. I'm TELLING people I'm writing which is big because there were only a few people that I told before that I liked to write and I don't really know why that was. The content of my writing? Possibly. The fact that I felt a little guilty taking that much time out for myself. Maybe. Maybe I was just frightened that everyone would think what I wrote was rubbish. I guess I don't know that either really. All I know is that I'm writing and I'm happy about it and I'm loving being able to pick bits of me back out of the archives and try and put the pieces of the puzzle all back together. I'm nowhere near finished but I'm trying.


Where am I going? Well after I make about thirty tiny tents for a Gold Rush diorama...Hopefully I can work on making my writing a success, I can enjoy seeing all of my children find there own love, happiness and tranquility...and my husband and I can sit back and enjoy each other, our family and our beautiful grandchildren.


Becky's Last Chance at Blushing Books


And at Amazon Kindle


My Fanfics can be found here...



Monday, June 25, 2012

BLOCKED...easily distracted...talks too much...need to concentrate...

That heading sounds like a report card doesn't it? Maybe that's because a lot of my report cards when I was growing up read pretty much like that. Nothing's changed.


I have days where my family can hardly get any sense out of me. I tap away like a woman possessed. Then there are times like now where I cannot tap out more than a few sentences and even then I don't like what I've written.


When I was at school and I was feeling this way I would usually talk to the person next to me. Fiddle around and put my hand up to go to the bathroom. In sewing class I even used to knock over the container of pins and spend the entire lesson picking them up. I didn't like to sew...Suffice to say I was in trouble a lot. I couldn't understand it at the time but I do now. While I help my own youngest child with homework...this child has a missing ruler,  non existent glue and an eraser that disappears everyday...What should take fifteen minutes takes a lot longer because he is so easily distracted.I can sympathise with him but I can also sympathise with what the teachers used to and probably still do go through.


Anyway the child is definitely my son because I can get a little distracted still myself. Just a little...I open a page in the morning and I read over what I finished on the day before...have a bit of a think and then go and make some coffee. Fix my son's lunch and wake him and then do breakfast. Once he's gone to school I go back and read a little before tapping out a few sentences. My hands though of their own accord  open Facebook....of course it is quite possible that someone may have posted something really important on there that I've missed....nope not really but I may as well have a few games of bejeweled, I muse. Hmmm half an hour later I realise that I haven't checked into Twitter yet. Now I really do need to thank everyone for their follows and of course their retweets. That reminds me that I really need to tweet agin to ask for more retweets for my book. It's only fair though that if you're asking for retweets that you do the same and retweet other people's requests. Could be possible that people are getting sick of reading my requests for retweets for my book, I think... so I spend sometime widening my horizons...following other people. That then gets me to wondering how my book's doing on Amazon...so I go to check there... it's a cycle.



Back to writing again and I've forgotten again what I was going to write so I go back and read a few paragraphs back...and the cycle starts again. Just as well I don't have to open a report card now...I can only imagine what it would say.



Housework....In fits and starts    C
Cooking....     Mostly                  A-
English......     Reads very well and is quite good at writing...thank goodness for spell check and editors.                                            A-
Science....       NA
History.....      Sometimes she can recall something that happened yesterday...but not often  D






Constance is an average housewife and writer who could benefit from getting her act together and not playing games when she is supposed to be working. She needs to learn to better organise her time...


Ain't that the truth.

                                                       
Becky's Last Chance at Blushing Books

And at Amazon Kindle

My Fanfics can be found here...


Wednesday, June 20, 2012

Camp for Delinquent Fiftysomethings

Today was a mammoth and very special day for a group of catholic schoolboys.



I know what you're thinking...school camp...vacation camp...perhaps one of those fitness camps...definitely not. Of course the heading may have given it away just a little. What I'm talking about is a fishing trip that my husband and his cronies have gone on.


Now I know a lot of planning went into the Queen's Diamond Jubilee, and of course some special thinking would have gone into the Olympics. You know they say that it takes a whole year of planning from one Sydney New Years fireworks until the next to get the mega production underway...none of these events have anything on the planning that went into this fishing trip.

As I helped my husband with his last minute packing this morning, I started to feel more like his Mum than his wife.
"I don't think I'll wear that." he said eyeing the outfit that had already been pulled out of the bag and changed over with a different outfit the night before.
"You're wearing it." I said. "We're not repacking again." Like any of our kids would have done when they heard that five o'clock in the morning tone in my voice, he didn't argue.


Back to the planning. The boys (sometimes cranky, old, past middle aged men) that are going on this trip...well gone on this trip now thank God...are a group of friends from catholic boy's school. This never fails to amaze and impress me, that this group of men have managed to remain firm friends for nearly fifty years. They've seen each other through everything life has thrown at them. Some serious stuff but a lot of happy fun stuff too.  Twenty first birthdays and the parties to celebrate them...Engagements and yes the parties, buck's nights...weddings and the wedding receptions, births of each others children and wet the babies heads, christenings and the barbecues...lots of barbecues...  We often do things as couples, but this trip is just for the boys. No wives and no kids.


More about the planning. It began with a list...a long list.  Now you can imagine what held the greatest priority on the list...there is a theme with their celebrating...it always involves beer. The thing that tickled me though were the additions that showed their age.


At one time a fishing trip list would have involved ...beer...a tent...a sleeping bag...meat, chips bread...of course fishing rods etc...the basics...No tent this time. They're staying in a large house with heat, a television and wi fi and their list was literally a mile long. It included things that at one time they wouldn't have bothered with.

Beer...always would have bothered with that
Toiletries....an improvement
Toothpicks...
Tissues
Toilet paper
Bedding... and a sleeping bag because they have to keep up the illusion that they're still young
Towels...lots cos now they actually do shower...a lot
Clothes...lots, after their shower they put on clean clothes



Then there was the food. The food part of the list ranged  from different types of cereal to anti pasta and
salads and steaks...Now this list was put into email form and  it danced between IPhones everyday. As each person had a chuckle, they'd add something else and pass it on. Several trips to the coordinator's house to finalise said list and inspect all items before crossing them off the list and they were ready... a week ago. Here I am thinking you just go to the supermarket and grab a trolley a throw what ever takes your fancy into it...I've been getting it wrong all these years...


Becky's Last Chance at Blushing Books

And at Amazon Kindle



My Fanfics can be found here...

Sunday, June 17, 2012

Better Than Sliced Bread

A couple of days ago, I was forced to come to terms with just how important the invention of the computer has been and of course of the internet.


Friday morning I woke up to find my daughter quite disturbed.
"The internet's not working." she said...Her face ashen like she'd actually lost a friend..and she had...sort of. Lots of them. So had I.
"Did you try restarting your computer?" I asked helpfully with one eye still not quite open.
"Tried it.
"Did you try turning off the electricity and turning it back on?"
"Yep. It's broken."
"I'll try mine." I said.


A half an hour later and we were standing there...stranded on our island...wondering what to do. We were Gilligan and the Skipper trying to figure out how we were going to get rescued.
"We should call someone." I said.
"Yeah." My daughter said.  "Do you know the number?"
"No." Damn...I thought.
"Don't we have phone books?"
"Nope." I said. "I threw them out because we have the computers...which don't work."
"Damn." she said.
"Yep." Luckily, being the enterprising person that I am, I thought to ring my other daughter who looked up the number for me and we were on the road to being back on the air again. Thank God.


So all this got me thinking. How in such a short period of time did we get so addicted to the internet?


I remember when we got our first computer. Boxy thing that it was...and we had only one and we had to share that among the whole family. We didn't even have the internet...we played solitaire and spider solitaire and some game where you killed a submarine with bombs. And if the kids were lucky we'd let them draw. Really...drawing would have been so much easier with a piece of paper and a pencil...but they were using a COMPUTER...the tool of the future, and it was, we just didn't know then how much so.
We did of course have the encyclopaedia disk that was great with assignments and such.


If anyone would have told me then that I would have friends on the other side of the world that I would talk to regularly...or that there would be a site where people wrote stories about how they wished their favourite TV shows turned out, I would have thought they were crazy. I never would have dreamed in a million years that I could write a book, send it overseas and sign a contract without ever having to leave my living room...truly amazing.


Becky's Last Chance at Blushing Books


And at Amazon Kindle




My Fanfics can be found here...


Thursday, June 14, 2012

Talking Machines and the People That May As Well Be Machines

I said I was going to talk about things that I love and things that I don't. Well today I had to deal with something I really don't like...the Tax department. 


Now I have no objection to paying taxes, that's fair. I guess it's even fair that they decide how much we pay. This is how it should go. We pay our taxes and if we don't pay enough...by mistake...they tell us how much we're short and give us the bill and we pay. If we pay too much, they give it back. Simple. Then we could avoid the whole actually  having to talk to them thing. Too easy.


So everything went as it should last year. We went to the accountant and put in the tax forms. Actually I did the tax on our behalf as I usually do because I have more time. The accountant tells us... ME the one who was there... how much we will get back and I leave. Simple right? Nothing is simple with the tax department. So the refund never comes. I did give it a thought but then I thought my husband probably got it out of the box and banked it, forgot to ask him. Apparently he didn't.


A couple of weeks ago he...my husband... mentions that it's been a long time with out the return.  I ring the accountant. No problem he says. I'll chase it up and  get back to you. He does...within the hour. He's actually nice and good at his job. 


"Problem". He tells me. They lost your return. They tried to tell him that they'd never received it but as he'd lodged it electronically he called them on it and gave them the date it was lodged. Surprise, surprise when the guy had another look he found it. "So it'll be another two weeks...they've put a rush on it.Sorry." 
"It's fine." I tell him "Not your fault." All fixed right? Wrong.


So two weeks went over and the cheque finally arrives. Good news you're thinking...she's nearly finished? No I'm not and it's not good news.  The cheque that comes is a fraction of what they owe us. The measly portion is accompanied by a form that supposedly explains why they've kept a large chunk of our money. Except that it's in the double dutch speak of the Tax Department. 


No problem, I think. I'm not easily rattled and I realise it's probably a mistake that can be easily explained. So I call the accountant who already received a copy of the said form. 
"I'm really sorry but they won't talk to me." he explains apologetically. "They say it's an old matter that was before you were dealing with us. You're going to have to ring them yourself." Damn...


So I phone and I punch in all the details and numbers that the first robot needs in order to put me on the cue for the second and then the third robot. Then I wait. Now I shouldn't really complain because I was after all being entertained by the music that is being pumped into my ears. And the fourth robot lady did tell me every five minutes that I'd progressed in the cue. Of course I could only take her word for it. Eventually an actually person comes on the line. I almost fainted with happiness. Kind of like someone who'd rowed around the world and was finally encountering a human being.
"How can I help you?" he asks. Now that's a trap. I immediately start to feel at ease. This man wants to help. We'll figure this out..won't we? NO we won't. 



After I rattle off the information yet again...the same information I'd given the robot, he tells me that he is unable to help me. "BUT!" he said enthusiastically...he could probably hear my dejected sigh. "I do have someone else that can help. Do you mind waiting a minute or two?"
No what's a minute when you've wasted a half an hour? He comes straight back on, because he IS the epitome of efficiency. "They don't seem to be answering." he tells me.  "I'm just going to pop you on a cue and they'll be right with you. Is that ok?"
"I guess not." I say. Back to the creepy loud music again and I know you're not going to believe me but yet another robot asking for my details.


So after another forty five minutes, another human being came on the line. This one had me wishing I could go back to the first guy.
"Name?" she asked snarkily. I gave it to her. 
"Date of birth?" I gave it to her. Then she hit me with the final straw.  "I'm sorry I have no authorisation to speak to you about this matter." 
"It's my matter. This man is my husband. I put in the return. He lets me. We're married. Sensing that I was a little upset now, she put on the in charge voice...you know the one you use when it's the very last time you're going to tell your kids to do something. The one that means business.
"You don't understand. I. Am. Telling you. That I cannot give you the information you require. Not until your husband phones and gives us authorisation to speak to you."
"I don't think you understand." I try to explain. "He's at work. He can't sit on the phone listening to your music and taking to your robots...for a solid hour and a half."
"He'll have to do it when he gets home then." she says.
"It'll be too late."I try to explain... I just wanted to work something out with the woman. "What if....?"
"We're open until six."
"It'll still be too late."
"Well the only other thing I can suggest is that he writes a letter. Of course that will take twenty eight days...after we receive it." Realising there was nothing I could do I sighed.
"Thank you for all your help." I said with just a touch of sarcasm. 
"You're very welcome." she said with a smile I was sure I could hear in her voice...another member of the public had been broken. 


Sunday, June 10, 2012

The Long Weekend That Isn't

I'd love to be talking about writing...which was my intention but sadly today it's not. Not a lot of writing has happened... well I updated one of my fanfics but that's all. I'd intended to do much more. Why? You might ask when it's a long weekend. BECAUSE it's a long weekend. Now don't get me wrong, I did plenty.


Long weekends mean that everyone gets another day right...more time to themselves, to attend to what ever they want to. Nope. MOST people get to do those things. Not me apparently and not this weekend. See the family is all home for this blessed event that is the Queen's birthday. Well not really the Queen's Birthday. The Queen's birthday was actually on April 21st. Weird I know...but we celebrate the Queen's Birthday on the second Monday of June...because we can and because we Australians do like a long weekend. Most of us.


The family being home means people that need things constantly, usually food. I sometimes imagine them all like a flock of tiny birds cheep cheep cheeping from their nest every time I walk into a room...what's for lunch...what's for dinner...where are my jeans...you know the blue ones...I left them to be washed.
"The clothes fairy is celebrating the Queen's Birthday I say." Not even a giggle just a blank face that's waiting for the right pair of blue jeans to materialise before whats his name arrives at the door. And they do...because I'm a soft touch and I've had all the whinging a person can take in one very long weekend.


Anyway I don't want to bore you all with our weekend antics because I'm sure most of you are enduring your own long weekends. I have though had time to play several million games of Bejeweled Blitz and as I say I updated one of my fanfics...they were on a cruise. Maybe next year I might try and go on a cruise, but not a Disney Cruise like my NCIS people. A quiet cruise where I don't have to cook.


Happy Birthday Queen Elizabeth! I hope they got you a cake even if it wasn't your real birthday.




Becky's Last Chance at Blushing Books


And at Amazon Kindle


My Fanfics can be found here...




Tuesday, June 5, 2012

Technically Challenged

I thought I was pretty internet savvy...you have to be internet savvy these days if you want to write, because nearly all of your writing is done on your computer an sent online. Bottom line is...I realise...I'm not.


Now I have long been a fan of Facebook. I love the games, I love sharing my family photos and looking at others and seeing what everyone's up to... I love the catching up with and making new friends, I love all of it.  That though is part of the problem.


So, I've written this book and I'd like to share it. Problem is, I really want to share it with strangers. The content of my books being what it is...erotic romance...spanking stories...mommy porn whatever you want to label it, you have to think seriously before sharing it with your family and friends right? So that was the plan to think about it first. I know it seems like I'm going a long way around getting to what I'm talking about but I will get there I promise.


The idea then was to open a new Facebook and Twitter...see how advanced this antiquated being is...I have BOTH Facebook and Twitter...I know right, your impressed. Now you have to bare in mind that both these tools of social interaction have passwords. Grrrr. passwords...the bane of life and the root of my problem. So, I chose the name I am writing under and I opened a new Facebook and a new Twitter and let's not forget this blog... all with passwords and different password requirements. You know...some you have to have a mixture of letters and numbers and some with characters...some you have to only have letters and some with only numbers...it's a nightmare for a middle aged woman with limited memory. Oh yes...apparently I'm not middle aged anymore, my son tells me...unless I'm planning on living to be over a hundred...I wonder what the next stage to middle aged is...I know it's not old...surely. Anyway I digress again...sorry...


Now the way I get out of the whole password thing normally is to stay logged on. Can't do that anymore. Now I know what you're thinking, why doesn't she just keep the same password for everything. I tried that but it just doesn't seem to work. And you only have to forget once and it makes you reset it...so to keep the same password you have to reset all your passwords...and remember all the secret questions. My favourite is your favourite pet...if your twelve...you may have only had one favourite pet... by the time you're not quite old but older than middle aged, you've had a few so it isn't that easy to remember. Anyway I muddle through, even if it takes me a few hours or a couple of days sometimes to figure out how to get back into my places.


Terminology is my latest struggle...so many words and so many meanings....there's RT and retweets and hashtags and handles. FF and buttons and DM and MT's and MMS's and those are just a few. I really thought that a widget was going to be something more interesting than it is.


Well it seems that I'm slowly working my way through because I've managed to get this blog up and running, now all I have to do is figure out how to get people to read it....LOL...laugh out loud...good aren't I ?


Monday, June 4, 2012

New Beginnings


I guess I should say hello and welcome...I hope I don't drive you all to boredom...or one of you or no one... no idea whether anyone will be interested in reading any of this...but I thought I might start by telling you where all this started for me.




This last week has been quite a week for me...pardon the pun. I've written my fanfics for a while and people seem to like them , which is good.  So I thought...why not try to write a book. I LOVE to write. When everyone is driving me crazy or if I'm bored or worried, I can sit down and start typing and it makes me feel better...it's calming. 




The first time I wrote a story it was fanfiction. I cringe a little when I go back and read that first story, it's...well rough...but hey everyone has to start somewhere so I did, pretty much at the bottom...again...pardon the pun. I was an avid reader of fanfiction and I mentioned to an author there (Ali) that I would love to write something. She was full of encouragement and I have to say if it wasn't for her I probably would have still been wishing I could try. 




So the EASY thing about fanfiction is that the characters have already been developed, so you have a place to start, sort of like starting  a jigsaw puzzle with the corners in place. The HARD thing is that you have to get the characters right, or it just doesn't ring true. I hope I get that right because I go to great pains to try and get the voices right in my head. I do though add my own characters , well sort of, most of the times the characters just add themselves, and they keep doing things that get them spanked..but that's not my fault,  I just go with the flow. 




As well as writing, I love to read, which is what lead me to Blushing Books. After reading numerous books I saw the button for 'Want to Write for Us?' I clicked it and decided I would give it a go. So that was where 'Becky's Last Chance' ...my first ever published work began. What's next? Hopefully you'll tune in and see :)
















Becky's Last Chance



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